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Forgiveness or Condemnation: It Depends part
II
Fr. John Cusick
Forgiveness and reconciliation
are all about relationships. When we have screwed up, it is not
enough to say, "I'm sorry" in mind or heart. It must be
expressed in order for healing to take place. Spoken words, symbols,
and gestures must be used to convey to another human being the forgiveness
we seek or the forgiveness we give. Sometimes a box of candy or
a dozen roses are more than they seem. They are "peace offerings."
They are symbols of a need to reconcile or be reconciled.
Interestingly, the word peace
in its Hebrew root, "Shalom,"really means a healing of
relationships.
At the beginning of mass we
hear, "Let us call to mind our sins." That is not said
to make us feel lousy and have us gravel in misery. Rather it is
the call of God to let go of our mistakes and wrongdoing and be
open to God's love, mercy and forgiveness. It is at this part of
the mass where we ask forgiveness in our words and prayers. "Lord,
have mercy. Christ, have mercy. Lord, have mercy."
We have a very graced moment
in our Church, the Sacrament of Reconciliation. It is powerful and
humbling, freeing and life giving. In the presence of a priest,
who reminds us of our God of unconditional love and unconditional
forgiveness, we release from within us our wrongdoing, our screw-ups,
and our sins. We let go of the power they have over us; the paralysis
that the past can inflict on us. We allow the love and life of God
to fill us. That is why it is a sacrament - a sacred moment when
we encounter our God of forgiveness, love and freedom. A sacrament
- A sacred moment when we encounter our God of forgiveness, love
and freedom.
But it doesn't stop there.
There is another extremely important component to an effective spiritual
life. It is rooted in the encounter between the risen Lord Jesus
and Peter, found toward the end of the Gospel of John (21:15-17).
This time, Jesus and Peter
stand facing each other. Consider it to be the first time that they
had seen each other since Peter denied even knowing Jesus the night
Jesus was arrested. What a powerful scene! What would it be like
the first time you came face to face with someone you thought loved
you, who betrayed your love and friendship? What would it be like
the first time you came face to face with someone you thought loved
you, who betrayed your love and friendship?
"Simon, son of John, do
you love me?" Jesus asks the same question three times. He
who was betrayed had the right, it seems, to want to know why he
did it; to let Peter know what is was like to feel abandoned; and
to just let Peter have it with all the pent-up rage, hurt and anger
Jesus could throw at him.
None of that happened. Instead
a simple question was asked three times, "Simon, son of John,
do you love me?" When you see things repeated in threes, it
is a scriptural way of saying that there is no other question. After
each of the three times that Peter answered Jesus' question, "Yes,
Lord, you know I love you," Peter was given a job: "Feed
my lambsÉ. Feed my sheepÉ. Feed my lambs." In other words,
if you are forgiven and loved by God, that is how you must feed
God's flock.
For us forgiveness and reconciliation
are all about relationships - our relationship to the Lord and God's
relationship to us. Forgiveness and reconciliation are about our
relationship to other people. They are about pouring love and forgiveness
into the world, not hate, meanness and bitterness.
These past few months have
been very ugly times in our country. There is not a lot that we
can say to make life more graceful. But there is a lot we can do.
After all, actions do speak louder than words. We can examine our
own lives and our many relationships. We can inventory where healing
and forgiveness need to take place. We can do it. We really can.
We may not be able to change the American landscape right now. But
we can be a sign of the very best way to live - God's way. We can
be a sacrament to all we meet of the presence of a loving, gracious
and forgiving God. "Simon, do you love me? Feed my lambs."
"Woman, neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now
on, do not sin again."What a world it can be!
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