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Forgiveness or Condemnation: It Depends
part II
Fr. John Cusick

Forgiveness and reconciliation are all about relationships. When we have screwed up, it is not enough to say, "I'm sorry" in mind or heart. It must be expressed in order for healing to take place. Spoken words, symbols, and gestures must be used to convey to another human being the forgiveness we seek or the forgiveness we give. Sometimes a box of candy or a dozen roses are more than they seem. They are "peace offerings." They are symbols of a need to reconcile or be reconciled.

Interestingly, the word peace in its Hebrew root, "Shalom,"really means a healing of relationships.

At the beginning of mass we hear, "Let us call to mind our sins." That is not said to make us feel lousy and have us gravel in misery. Rather it is the call of God to let go of our mistakes and wrongdoing and be open to God's love, mercy and forgiveness. It is at this part of the mass where we ask forgiveness in our words and prayers. "Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy. Lord, have mercy."

We have a very graced moment in our Church, the Sacrament of Reconciliation. It is powerful and humbling, freeing and life giving. In the presence of a priest, who reminds us of our God of unconditional love and unconditional forgiveness, we release from within us our wrongdoing, our screw-ups, and our sins. We let go of the power they have over us; the paralysis that the past can inflict on us. We allow the love and life of God to fill us. That is why it is a sacrament - a sacred moment when we encounter our God of forgiveness, love and freedom. A sacrament - A sacred moment when we encounter our God of forgiveness, love and freedom.

But it doesn't stop there. There is another extremely important component to an effective spiritual life. It is rooted in the encounter between the risen Lord Jesus and Peter, found toward the end of the Gospel of John (21:15-17).

This time, Jesus and Peter stand facing each other. Consider it to be the first time that they had seen each other since Peter denied even knowing Jesus the night Jesus was arrested. What a powerful scene! What would it be like the first time you came face to face with someone you thought loved you, who betrayed your love and friendship? What would it be like the first time you came face to face with someone you thought loved you, who betrayed your love and friendship?

"Simon, son of John, do you love me?" Jesus asks the same question three times. He who was betrayed had the right, it seems, to want to know why he did it; to let Peter know what is was like to feel abandoned; and to just let Peter have it with all the pent-up rage, hurt and anger Jesus could throw at him.

None of that happened. Instead a simple question was asked three times, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" When you see things repeated in threes, it is a scriptural way of saying that there is no other question. After each of the three times that Peter answered Jesus' question, "Yes, Lord, you know I love you," Peter was given a job: "Feed my lambsÉ. Feed my sheepÉ. Feed my lambs." In other words, if you are forgiven and loved by God, that is how you must feed God's flock.

For us forgiveness and reconciliation are all about relationships - our relationship to the Lord and God's relationship to us. Forgiveness and reconciliation are about our relationship to other people. They are about pouring love and forgiveness into the world, not hate, meanness and bitterness.

These past few months have been very ugly times in our country. There is not a lot that we can say to make life more graceful. But there is a lot we can do. After all, actions do speak louder than words. We can examine our own lives and our many relationships. We can inventory where healing and forgiveness need to take place. We can do it. We really can. We may not be able to change the American landscape right now. But we can be a sign of the very best way to live - God's way. We can be a sacrament to all we meet of the presence of a loving, gracious and forgiving God. "Simon, do you love me? Feed my lambs." "Woman, neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now on, do not sin again."What a world it can be!

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